And I guess I start with that title because I know I’ve disagreed with women about this in the past, some of whom I have enjoyed the debate and still very much respect their opinions. I guess my first real experience with this was the crustgate scandal, where I said that we could probably move on from a joke about women being worse drivers than men.

It’s about feminism, so if that topic bores you to tears then maybe you might want to skip out on this post.

On the surface of it- I have nothing against feminism in itself if you take it in its very straightforward sense in that there should be equality for men and women (and please jump in and correct me on any of this because I do not profess to know the ins and outs of feminism). The fact that women were not allowed to drink in public bars and vote to me is ridiculous and no doubt you feel the very same way. Just as a side note, I think (and also hope) that future generations are just as embarrassed that gay people are not allowed to get married in so many places around the world including Australia. I’m embarrassed by it now if I’m perfectly honest.

Anyway, I digress.

The women in this video are amazing people and thank goodness they did what they did back then so that the world is a better place today. I agree that there are boys clubs and sexism still does exist but I guess I’m wondering if the message at the end is what we really want to be saying to young women.

The message to young women is, you might think you’re equal – but mate you’re not, you earn less; you earn less per hour; you earn less over your lifetime; you do a heap of unpaid work because someone’s gotta do it
You don’t run things – you don’t decide things – so don’t have the illusion you’ve got choice.

Eeeek! What a negative message.

I guess everyone’s opinions are shaped by their own life experiences. For me personally my parents divorced when I was in about Year 8 and following this, there were a lot of tough experiences. Through this though, one of the most valuable things my Mum every taught me was how to be strong, set your goals and work hard until you get it.

It was hard, but the rewards were fantastic. I represented NSW in Softball, I bought my first car at 16 with my own money, I was a trainee manager at McDonalds just before I turned 17 and scored 93 in my HSC. I got a Scholarship to University and have loved being in HR ever since.

The point is, my Mum taught me to be independent and I grew up believing that I could achieve anything I wanted. More specifically, I didn’t have to rely on a man to make anything happen for me. My sisters and I all know how to cook, but we also all mowed the lawns and looked after our own cars (I can’t quite change a tyre but everything else I’m ok with!).

In the video, they talk a lot about the fact that there ‘were a set of expectations’ around what women were going to be. I guess I’m just wondering whether messages like the one above is helpful, or whether we should be inspiring women to see that they can have anything they want in life if that’s the attitude they take.

I’d be interested in what you think, particularly if you are a blogger who blogged on International Women’s Day or even commented on a blog last week.

As you might already know, my partner works in the media industry and I like to hear about what he does when he comes home just as he listens to me and my HR adventures for that particular day. He’s accompanied me to HR events and I like to go along to some of his events. I like to do this because I am interested in social media (not that that is all he does by the way!) and also because it reminds me to step out of that HR mindset at work i.e. I remember not everyone thinks like us.

Yesterday on Mumbrella, there was an article posted on Crust, (Gourmet Pizza Bar) because they tweeted this comment “Need a laugh? Hilarious compilation of female driver madness” and provided this link to a video showing bad female drivers.

There was a bit of a reaction on twitter about it being offensive and a few hours later they tweeted “Sorry guys, we apologise for the video and meant no offense to drivers, female or otherwise. Lesson learned and thanks for the feedback.”

People then started commenting on Mumbrella with both sides of the argument being represented. I posted the following comment:

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Basically what I was saying is, that even in the workplace there are times when this sort of thing happens and its no scandal or major issue because we are all human and diverse individuals. In a working environment there is bound to be times when someone makes a comment like this which in hindsight they might later regret. My point though was that this was clearly a one-off that they have already apologised for and not something that needs to be made into a huge deal. It was a “silly” comment, and even when bullying and harassment complaints are considered in the courts, they take into account how affected the individual was, what a reasonable person would consider to be offensive etc. I just thought people should lighten up a bit, as there are many more serious incidents which need to be represented.

Someone anonymously replied to my comment with this:

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While I find this person’s language towards me offensive (lol), I would like to reply and invite your comments as well- as the Sydney Human Resources Community.

Let’s treat this as a real workplace scenario. Someone in the workplace makes a comment about females being bad drivers in a clear attempt to be humorous and make others laugh.

Workplace bullying or harassment involves the persistent ill treatment of a person (get NSW info here). In other words:

It is repeated or persistent over a period of time
It is offensive, intimidating, humiliating, or degrading and ridicules or insults the person at work.

The tweet concerned was not repeated or a persistent message over a period of time so you would be hard pressed getting this one across the line as bullying and harassment. Not to say it should be ignored, it should be addressed if the individual wishes to, but it’s important to note that it isn’t bullying or harassment generally until it is repeated (serious breaches would be handled differently). Now I acknowledge that some may have found it offensive or even degrading towards women- so let’s run with that line i.e. you have someone that comes to you at work saying that they feel that way.

As a HR professional, the steps that I would normally recommend to someone who is being bullying would be listed as following:

Keep detailed records about the incidents- this could be jotting down something in an email or on paper
Talk about it with someone who can provide assistance such as your manager, HR staff or an Equity and Diversity Officer.
If you feel comfortable let the bully know that their behaviour makes you feel uncomfortable
Do not retaliate- and walk away from the situation if it becomes out of control
Seek resolution – informal or formal process

So in the workplace, the person who was offended would have come to me and as per the above, I would recommend that they speak with Crust Pizza and let them know that it makes them uncomfortable (which the twitter community did). What was the outcome?

Crust Pizza apologised and reiterated that it “meant no offense to drivers, female or otherwise”. They then articulated that they had learned their lesson and then thanked the community for the feedback.

You couldn’t ask for this to have gone any better in the workplace.

My personal opinion was that it wasn’t a big deal and I personally wasn’t offended by it. I am able to have a laugh at myself and acknowledge that I will make mistakes. Coming from a sport background it’s important to remember that Babe Ruth is remembered as the home run king even though he still holds the record for the greatest number of strikeouts!

So keen to hear your thoughts. Did I deserve the bashing from @HR Infraction for voicing my personal opinion?